- Women only
- Friendship, not dating
- Free to join
- Local guide
- October 21, 2026
Make Friends After 40 in Barnet once the school run eases off
In close to 20% of Barnet homes a married couple is still raising school-age children, so plenty of women in their 40s are reclaiming evenings at once.
61,100+
people in Barnet were in their forties at mid-2025, according to ONS estimates
15%
share of Barnet residents aged 40 to 49, compared with 14% London-wide (ONS, mid-2025)
20%
of households in Barnet are a married couple or civil partners raising dependent children, against 16% London-wide (ONS Census 2021)
Barnet evenings open up as the children grow
Women in their 40s in Barnet often find that teenagers need lifts less and company more rarely, which leaves an evening free for something of your own. Barnet Choral Society rehearses on Wednesday nights in term and does not audition, Stephens House and Gardens in Finchley has a café and volunteer roles, and Copthall in Hendon keeps its pool open until 9pm on weekdays. Gofrendly offers a further way to reach women nearby with the same new free time.
Barnet after 40: choirs, pools and volunteering
Is there a Barnet choir for 40-something women who have never sung?
Barnet Choral Society is a non-auditioned adult choir that rehearses on Wednesday evenings from 7.40pm in the main hall at Queen Elizabeth’s School in Barnet. New members pay nothing for their first term, and the autumn 2026 term runs from early September until 19 December, so Barnet newcomers can try it.
Where can you volunteer at a historic house in Barnet?
Stephens House and Gardens is a historic house and garden on East End Road in Finchley, with a café open every day. It runs seasonal activities through the year and lists volunteering roles under Get Involved, which makes it a friendly base for Barnet residents who prefer doing something useful together.
Where can you swim in the evening in Barnet?
Barnet Copthall Leisure Centre in Hendon and New Barnet Leisure Centre are both run by Better, with weekday swimming until 9pm at Copthall and 9.30pm at New Barnet. Finchley Lido Leisure Centre is a third option. Booking the same evening lane each week is a habit Barnet women can keep up together.
Where do women in Barnet meet friends close to home?
Gofrendly, a women-only friendship app, lets Barnet women browse others living close by and drop them a line about a walk or coffee. A loop of Friary Park or tea at Stephens House is an unhurried first plan once the school run is behind you.
Finding your own circle again in Barnet
Barnet is one of the largest London boroughs, stretching from Golders Green and Hendon up to Edgware, Mill Hill and the edge of Hertfordshire. In nearly one Barnet household in five, a married couple or civil partners have children at home, higher than the London average, and more than 61,100 Barnet residents are in their forties. Once those children reach secondary school, the friendships built at the school gate can thin out, so if you want to make friends after 40 here, set up a fixed weekly commitment of your own on purpose.
The family calendar can empty faster than your social one fills, and that gap is a lonely place to sit for long. Choirs, conservation work and lane swimming all reward showing up regularly, and the borough has all three. A non-auditioned choir, a historic house with volunteer roles, Friends of parks groups and a Saturday 5k each give you a standing appointment with the same faces. Places worth trying:
1
Barnet Choral Society, rehearsing on Wednesday evenings during term.
2
Stephens House and Gardens on East End Road, with a café and volunteers.
3
Barnet Copthall Leisure Centre in Hendon, for lane swimming after work.
4
Friends of Friary Park and Friends of Cherry Tree Wood, local park groups.
5
Oak Hill parkrun in East Barnet, every Saturday at 9am.
LOCAL TIP
Book the first choir rehearsal of term and let the rest follow.
How to
Barnet steps for making friends in your 40s
1
Join Barnet Choral Society for a term; new members pay nothing until the second.
2
Volunteer at Stephens House and Gardens and stay on for coffee in the café.
3
Use Gofrendly to message Barnet women whose children are also growing up.
4
Swim lengths at Copthall or New Barnet on the same weeknight each week.
Stories and numbers on friendship
A Barnet guide for growing families
Our editors and Gofrendly founders Claudia Gård and Ulrika Lilja wrote this Barnet guide for women whose children are growing up and who now want a circle that is theirs alone.
Friendship looks different at every stage
More guides for women in this area – each with its own local advice.
Friendship looks different at every stage
More guides for women in this area – each with its own local advice.
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